Measure of Life 

Lately, I have been thinking about the measure of my life. Perhaps it was losing so many of my family members in such a short period of time. Or it could have been almost losing the boys in the accident and Alex twice more after that. It could be because my 20 year high school reunion is this year. More than likely, it is because I am going to be, ummm, 40 next year. 

What have I really accomplished in those 40 years? What about all of the dreams I had for my life? How will I check off these bucket list items, and who in the world thought it was a good idea to pressure people to create bucket lists in the first place?!?! 

My life simply didn’t turn out like I intended it to and most likely, my life is already half way over. For all I know, it could be over tomorrow. Three generations from now, no one will remember me, other than by name. I will be a person that family members tell stories about. My image only captured by photographs. Sounds quite melodramatic, but it is simply the truth. The earth is billions of years old. My short time here means nothing against those numbers. 

 I’ve come to terms that my life is not going to have this monumental change on the world that can be measured. I won’t be famous for a medical breakthrough. Obviously, and if you know me, I most definitely will not be a Grammy award winning singer. I will never be the President of the United States. Thankfully, I believe that God does have purpose for me here, even if it cannot be measured by those standards. 

 After the accident, we started using the saying, “You only get one life, so live it.” I’m trying to determine now what it means to actually live. What is happiness? At the end of my life, can I say that it was worth it all? 

I don’t have the answers to these questions. What I do know beyond a shadow of a doubt is that I have raised strong and loving boys, and they may actually change the world. I have a feeling that it will be all of those small moments in my life that add up in the end to have created a life worth living for. At least, that’s what I’m hoping for… 

Love and blessings, 


Things I’ve Learned

If you’re human and have a pulse, chances are you have been thinking back on what you did this year and most assuredly what you didn’t do. Millions of dollars are spent by big corporations to remind you that you should have a resolution and that this is THE year for you to keep it! Everyone on social media is talking about their goals and what they’ve already accomplished or plan to accomplish in the new year. Better yet, there are “those” people that make sure to announce they don’t do New Year’s resolutions. And seriously, how many meme’s about New Years could their possibly be? You know, the ones designed to make you contemplate your life’s purpose and just for a second you think you really can aspire to achieve it? Until real-life sets in of course.

With all of that, how could I not be thinking about my last year and everything I learned and did? I should warn you that this is not one of those posts meant to inspire you into greatness just by reading it. The things I learned this year were real-life lessons. Some good, some bad. The truth is, that is real life. It isn’t always all rainbows and sunshine. Life is great, but with it comes heartbreak and loss.

The hardest thing I learned this year? Giving up on your dream, even if temporarily, sucks. Like… a lot. For those that don’t know me personally, 4 of our boys were in a car accident last year paralyzing our 8-year-old son and setting off a whirlwind of hospitalizations and surgeries for our 19-year-old. I remember reading an article about Joanne Gaines and how she decided to close her very first storefront to be a stay-at-home mom. Of course, now she is a super star running a multimillion dollar business. I wonder if she easily transitioned to both roles with as much grace and ease as it sounded in that article. If she had those moments when she thought she would go crazy if she couldn’t be around other adults for one more single day. I knew that being at home with the boys was where God wanted me to be. I simply couldn’t be at my store without feeling guilty about not being with my boys, nor could I be with them without thinking about all I needed to do at the store. By nature, I am an overachiever who needs stay busy. I must have goals and something to achieve. It was difficult to switch gears so completely and abruptly. Being a stay-at-home mom is hard. You don’t earn a paycheck and in most cases, you aren’t even thanked for all that you do. But my point is this: Just because we are where God needs us to be doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy. Sometimes, it is harder. But it is in those places that we are able to grow and to learn the most.

A few other things I learned this year?

It is okay to have days when it is simply too much work to put makeup on and fix your hair. This is totally acceptable. However, it isn’t acceptable to not brush your teeth, brush your hair or wear pajamas in public. For God’s sake, please don’t wear pajamas in public…

It is okay to be late or accidently miss an appointment. Believe it or not, the world does not shift course on its axis. It actually happened to me and I assure you, the world kept on turning.

It’s okay to not have a clean house every single day. Really, how many people ever actually come to your house to even know if it’s clean or not??? And if you’re OCD and you actually do want your house clean every single day like me, it’s okay to own that shit too. As I told my husband, being OCD is my coping mechanism so he is just going to have to deal with it.

I am never going to be the person I want to be. Sounds melodramatic, doesn’t it? But the truth is, we should always strive to be better than we are right now. Why was this such an important revelation to me? I am not perfect. There, I said it. And guess what? Neither are you. Isn’t that so freeing? It is okay to be who you are, right this very minute.

Some friends, even the ones we think will always be there, won’t. They will hurt you deeply and you simply have to learn to let go.

It’s entirely appropriate to scream at people while sometimes showing them your bird finger when driving because they are an idiot and shouldn’t have a license. Well, perhaps not but as I just pointed out, I’m not perfect.

I don’t have to fit my body into mid-rise jeans when high-rise jeans are so much more comfortable. That’s all.

It is okay to sometimes want to stab your significant other in the eye with a fork. Because there is no way I am the only one who has thought this. Right?!?! My point is, marriage is sometimes hard. Life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine, as mentioned above. Life is real and let’s face it, sometimes crappy. It is why we vow until death do us part. There are days when we don’t feel “the love.” And that’s okay too.

I hope that if you too have spent time thinking about your life this year and where you want to be, you have been able to accept that who you are is exactly who you were meant to be.

Cheers and Happy New Year,

C.C. Andrewshappy-new-year-2016-funny-quotes

Doing the Right Thing Sucks 

After paying over $43,000 over the last 4 years in rent to the owners for the lease of our auto shop, they decided to go behind our back and have us evicted. We are not sure what is really going on. Are they foreclosing or possibly have someone lined up that agreed to pay more than we were paying? To be honest, I have never had a fondness (a polite way of saying it) for this couple. They had zero sympathy for our family after the accident. 

While closing my store this summer (’cause the wreck seriously flipped every part of our lives upside down) they tell us we have to pay double what we had been paying on the storage units we have been renting over four years because all of their units were full and they could now ask full price. If I wasn’t willing to pay it, I would have to move out by the end of the month, which was 2 weeks away. Didn’t matter that I was in the hospital with Jackson at the time and physically couldn’t do it. They illegally took the contents of our storage units by not giving us 30 days notice. Yes, we are taking legal action, but it shouldn’t have ever happened. Who takes from someone that is in the circumstances we have been in for the last year? Especially while they are in the hospital with their child. These people do. 

While moving our things out of the shop, my two oldest sons asked me why I was cleaning after what they did to us. Because, I told them, “It is the right thing to do. Yes, what I would really like to do is not spend my time cleaning after the way they have treated us, but I will continue to do what’s right because I believe that you reap what you sow.” They pointed out that this principle doesn’t seem to be working for me. True. Here lately I wonder why I strive so hard to do the right thing. We have had bad luck on top of bad luck. During the 10 days they somehow illegally forced us to move in, my uncle suddenly passed away. During the funeral, my son went into Diabetic DKA and had a pancreatic attack. I rushed him to Vanderbilt and we spent 4 days in the ICU. While there, he fractured his tooth from clenching in pain and had to leave Vanderbilt to be rushed to the dentist to have his tooth extracted. After getting him home, I had to finish moving the shop. All of this in the span of 10 days! 

Yes, sometimes it seems like no matter what you do right, nothing good ever comes from it. It can feel incredibly unfair, and you wonder why you even bother. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you doesn’t always have immediate results, if any. But as I told my sons, at the end of the day I am responsible for MY actions. You have to treat people the way you want to be treated. When I choose to not do the right thing, it is on my conscious. I have to live with the decisions I make. And when I make it to my forever home in heaven, I will then have to answer to God for those choices. Not to mention, I have my 5 children watching every little thing that I do. I am teaching them, through action, how to live their lives. I want them to choose to do the right thing, even when it feels pointless. 

So, despite the fact that this couple has stolen from us and treated us deplorably, the building was handed over to them in the allocated 10 days completely empty and clean! Sometimes it sucks to do the right thing, when you really just want to treat people the way they treat you. Just remember, doing the right thing is for YOU, not them. 

Love & blessings,